My name is Adam 22.

I am here joined by my lovely wife, Lynn of the Plug.

Hi everyone.

And today we've got a repeat guest,

somebody that my wife here, sorry,

my wife here just loves to talk to,

which is why it's been taking us a little while

to start recording here

because you guys are just gabbing it up.

Come on, you love to hear our stories.

I love it, yeah.

They like the real friend vibes too.

We haven't seen each other in a while.

We need to catch up.

And then share a dick.

Since the wedding.

And then share a dick, yeah.

That's what friends are for, right?

Catching up and sharing penis.

In this game, Alina Lopez is on the couch.

How are you doing?

I'm great, it's good to be back.

Thank you for having me back.

It's been what, a year, a year and a half?

A year and a half, I would say.

She just told me that her New Year's resolution

is still 20-23, guys, is to fuck more people

because her body count was 10 or less this year.

Less than 10 this year.

In the whole year.

In the whole year.

You know, a lot of Red Pill podcasters

would tell you that 10 is way too much for a lifetime.

But see, I'm, is it?

I don't listen to that stuff.

In this very specific world of the Whatever Podcasts

and Fresher Finn.

I stay in my world.

Andrew Tate, once you got 10 bodies,

it's kind of over.

You're used.

Yeah, you're done.

Oh well.

It refreshes at the beginning of the year

is what I was telling her.

It resets to zero.

Not in the Red Pill podcast world, ladies.

You're back at zero.

This isn't a Red Pill podcast.

This is true, this is a foreign podcast.

It's really kind of the opposite, yeah.

A whore-centric podcast.

I like that, yeah.

Whore lore.

Would you capitalize that?

Sure.

Proper noun.

I like it.

So, okay, why do you wanna fuck more guys this year?

I was trying to lay more low this year

and see if it would help me feel like a better person

and it didn't.

I feel like a better person when I'm being more of a whore.

So I'm just gonna go back to that

because I was definitely happier

when I was being a bigger slut.

Well, that's interesting.

Because yeah, I feel like I haven't really seen

that much of you in the last year.

Have you not been coming out to LA

and doing your porn thing?

Not very much.

That's what I'm saying.

I haven't been fucking enough people, so.

And so that doesn't sit right with your soul

or where are you at on that?

No, it doesn't feel natural.

It doesn't feel normal or healthy.

What steps are you gonna take

to make sure your New Year's resolutions come true?

Hang out with you guys more.

Yeah.

You're gonna go on the dating apps?

I feel like all the girls who come on here

use the dating apps to fuck people.

No, I cannot.

No, oh my God.

No, it's funny,

because the guys will go on there.

You think it's like we're all just here for sex, right?

Especially Tinder.

But no, I swear every guy I go on a date with from Tinder

falls in love with me.

And might look at you.

But it's funny,

because all those podcasts,

they say men don't like women who are whores,

and I'm very blatantly myself when I go on these dates,

and they still are trying to wipe me out.

Men may be revolted by a high body count,

but at the same time, conflicting intuitions.

Because at the same time, we like girls with status,

we like girls with money, and we like hot girls.

So for a guy, I think a lot of girls end up

with this weird thing,

where the guy's into him at first,

because they have all these things,

but then as time goes by,

they start to have a hard time with the sluttiness.

So that's why the dude.

You nailed it.

The guys who date porn stars,

they start out real into it,

but then as time goes by,

they're thinking about it more and more.

Like, oh, you fucked two guys today.

I don't feel too good about that.

And then they start kind of backtracking.

That's the story of every relationship I've had

since I started porn.

Like you nailed it. Really?

Oh yeah, it's exactly that.

They're so into it, and excited,

and feel cool to be involved, and support me.

And then it just slowly starts to fade and go away.

And all of a sudden, they're intimidated by my income,

and don't want me shooting,

and don't want me even on social media.

And obviously, that's hard stop for them.

But you never stop shooting with guys for anyone.

No, never.

You just decided to stop.

I just break up with them.

But these relationships have probably hurt your momentum

career-wise in the long run, wouldn't you say, or no?

No, I never have let it affect me.

And I think that's what makes them insecure.

If you slow down on anything,

it's always been 100% no, I'm not gonna settle.

Yeah, the only time I've ever slowed down in my career

were COVID, obviously.

And then this year, but that was my own choice,

because I've been single.

I just chose to-

She broke up with a guy she brought to our wedding

right after our wedding.

Yeah.

I mean, we weren't even fully in a relationship,

so you can hardly call it a breakup.

But you said you've been dating for six months

at that point.

Is that not, how long does it take

to fully be in a relationship?

Like a year.

Do you think so?

Yeah, I'm like, I move slow.

I kind of feel that.

But they had already moved in together.

When we're talking about how many long-term relationships

we've had, and I think of a few in my head

that were like three, four, five months,

and it's like, they felt serious,

but do I consider them as serious as girls

that I was in relationships with for like two years?

I mean, four months is really like,

it's just a quick trip, really.

Yeah, I feel like between six months and a year

is usually when I am deciding how serious I am.

But before that six-month mark, it's just casual dating.

Let me tell you a story.

So you're at our wedding, right?

And you're with this guy that you're dating,

and at the time, this was nine months ago or whatever,

or less than that.

But so one of my guys is talking to me,

and everybody's had a few drinks and stuff,

and he just starts saying to me,

like, bro, this is crazy.

We're at your wedding,

and there's like nine chicks here that you fucked,

or seven chicks that you fucked, or whatever.

And you know me, I'm used to the porn shit,

so I'm not really thinking about it like that.

I don't give a fuck.

I don't look at you and be like, man,

I remember when she was hot-dicked that time.

I had to tell that guy, I was like, listen,

I fucked a lot of people at this wedding.

I had to disclose to him, too, so.

But so, okay, as he's saying that to me,

we look over and kind of just both make eye contact

with you, and you're sitting like this,

and your boyfriend at the time is sitting behind you,

holding you like this.

Where, on the bus?

No, on a bench at the whole dinner thing or whatever,

and as soon as we make eye contact with you,

and you're wearing a dress, you go, ah!

And your whole, I don't even think you had underwear on.

I think it was just straight up pubes.

All we see is just vagina.

Can you say bush at the ass of the vagina?

And so that's cool.

That's not that out of the ordinary,

but what struck me as hilarious was that

as you split your legs open, and me and my homie

kind of make eye contact with your pussy,

the guy, yah, he clenched the legs right together

because he's not that stoked on us seeing your pussy.

Yeah, yeah, even though it's like, I don't.

You'd be like, I've been in there, dude.

Yeah, just looking at it is not that big a deal.

Did he push my legs shut?

I was telling Lena, I was already drunk at this point,

so I don't remember that, but I believe you.

So that took too long to come down the aisle.

Yeah, so I was just slamming champagne.

I don't blame you, because I probably.

It was beautiful though, it was worth it.

I'm not complaining, but I'm just saying

that's why I was drunk.

I know, but I was kind of hungover on my wedding day,

so I didn't really feel,

I probably should have drank more, but I didn't,

and instead, I just kind of was dealing

with the hangover all day.

I don't think I was drunk at all.

You guys all partied that night.

I was like, we had just gotten in,

so I didn't go to your bachelorette night thing.

Oh, no, no, we did that, and then the night after that,

he went on a boys' night.

Oh.

Yeah, because at the entry dinner or whatever,

I got drunk that night too, and that fucked me up

for two days afterwards, because I never drank anymore.

Yeah, bad choice.

After your rehearsal dinner,

remember how there was no Ubers?

Mm-hmm.

We walked home.

It was like four or five miles.

What?

It was like on a hill?

Yeah.

In the darkness?

How the fuck did you walk home?

We were like in the mountains.

Yeah, we walked.

We literally walked.

You were supposed to go inside

and ask the hotel to order you a car.

We talked to them for a minute,

and it was like a whole thing,

and people, a bunch of people were waiting.

We were like, fuck it, let's just walk,

so we walked from there to our place.

Wasn't there like no sidewalks,

and it was like two in the morning?

No, I was just with that guy.

Oh, okay, because I heard that Nick carry Sky

on his back for like many miles as well.

No, I just took off my shoes,

and we just walked through the streets of Italy

in the middle of the night.

It was kind of fun, actually.

It wasn't the streets, we're like off in the woods.

I'm very confused.

Like, I don't even understand how this is true.

Yeah, no, we did walk through the,

no, I'm not even cheating right now.

We fully walked home.

Okay, but so you're telling me

that the love that was in the air

during our wedding ceremony

was not enough to keep you together with this guy?

What happened?

I don't know.

I just like, I'm not really a relationship person.

I'm finding out.

You've been in a relationship like the whole time.

We've known you like mad different boyfriends.

No, I haven't.

Everyone thinks I'm like a serial dater.

You're like a Taylor Swift.

I'm not.

I have had, I have like lightly dated three people

in the last six years.

That's not that much.

And I've been single for like a year between each one.

It's just that every time that I've seen you,

you've brought a dude.

It's just because I'm usually am with them

for a long time.

And we've met all the guys where I was like,

a lot of girls have boyfriends,

but we don't really see them.

No, you guys, I was telling Lena too,

you guys are the only,

I've only like dated three people during my career,

and you guys have met every single one of them.

Because normally with foreign stars,

we don't do really much with other foreign stars

besides like shoot content,

maybe go to some parties,

maybe once in a blue moon, get dinner.

But for the most part, you know,

we're in the foreign industry,

but it's just business.

And then there's us who go on vacations together.

We went and met up with you on Mount Zion

and went hiking.

Do you say Mount Zion?

You sound like such a tourist.

I mean, you tell me what it's called.

Zion National Park.

Oh, sure, whatever.

Sorry.

Mount Zion.

We ran into each other in Hawaii.

It's a canyon.

It's not a mountain.

We hung out with you and another boyfriend in Hawaii.

Yeah.

And yeah.

I have a boyfriend in Zion.

I brought my little sister.

Right, right.

That's right.

I figured there was probably some guy

who was your boyfriend there,

but just filling in the blanks in my mind.

Yeah.

Okay.

So besides not fucking enough people,

what has life been like for Elena Lopez lately?

I've been like laying pretty low this year.

I've like been like,

cause I worked my ass off so intensely the first few years

that like I've been like,

I built a house and I bought another house in Salt Lake.

So I'm trying to like buy more properties right now.

So I kind of been like doing stuff outside of porn.

Is this studio money or OnlyFans money?

What?

That lets you buy multiple properties.

OnlyFans money.

Okay.

Do you think you'll ever go back to shooting for studios?

I've never stopped.

Everyone thinks I stopped.

I just like am very, very like limited.

Like I did like maybe two or three mainstream ones this year.

Yeah.

And is there specific companies that you want to shoot for?

I'm not really reaching out to anyone.

It's like, if they're reaching out to me

and like wanting me to come, then I'll do it.

But I'm not really like seeking that out anymore.

Is it worth it for the promotion from your perspective?

Yeah, I think so.

And I'm only accepting shoots from companies

that I really love and enjoy working with

and talent that I enjoy working with.

So it's been nice to kind of like be more choosy with that.

But next year, I really just want to like go all out again.

So.

So you're gonna come out here more.

Yeah, what's that look like for you going all out?

Like just get back into shooting more,

more like content for my OnlyFans

and more like mainstream, just everything.

So, cause I used to be so like intensely in it.

And like I said, I kind of stepped back.

So I'm like ready to dive back in.

Can I tell him about your one caveat?

What's my caveat?

No more big dicks.

Oh yeah, I can't.

I can't be a size queen anymore.

Do I qualify?

No.

Hell yeah.

In this case, it's actually good to have a small dick.

Wait, did you?

Okay.

I thought you were gonna say, do I qualify?

I love how you always say that.

It's not small.

Well, it's like, if you said you had a small ass,

I'd be like, oh yeah, it's not small.

You have a nice ass.

So like, I would be offended if you started

hating on your own body too.

So I like that you stand up for my dick.

You don't have a small dick, okay?

It's just smaller than a giant dick.

Sometimes I look down on it and I'm kind of impressed.

You have a big dick.

It's just not a giant dick.

You're the first person to ever call it a boyfriend dick.

That's where we started to hear this lingo.

I was just gonna say that again right now.

That's funny.

Did I say that last time?

You did say it to him.

You called it a nice boyfriend dick

and we didn't know what that was really,

but now more and more girls have said it to him.

So now I'm like, I get it.

I declared it.

I declared it a boyfriend dick.

I try to blame it on being white,

but then we got like Girthmaster and Alex Jones and shit.

Yeah.

Not Alex Jones, Alex Legend.

Well, Alex Jones.

But they're not from America.

Maybe Americans have normal size white dicks.

I don't know.

Normal size white dicks.

Okay, but so you going crazy.

That just means shooting a lot of content

or are you gonna be going,

oh wait, why the small dick thing?

Why no giant dicks?

The last time I shot a scene with a guy

with like a really big dick,

I ended up in the hospital.

I had like internal bleeding.

Like he like literally like fucked my,

you know what they say?

What do they say?

Like rearrange your guts.

Like that's essentially what happened to me,

but like for real.

What did the doctors say?

Did you tell them I was fucking a giant dick?

Yeah, I did.

I had to.

I had to be honest,

because I needed to know what was going on

and I had like eight different OBGYNs

and they're all like fingering me

and I had just taken a giant dick.

I'm like, I'm so sore.

Please stop.

And they're all like feeling my cervix.

They're like, oh yeah, it's really bruised.

I'm like, yeah, can you stop touching it?

Like it hurts.

Whose giant dick did this to you?

I don't want to say,

because he was really nice.

I'm not trying to like trash talk him.

He doesn't know.

Oh, he doesn't know.

He doesn't know.

And I, he was great.

I just, I couldn't take it.

So I'm no longer a size queen.

I can't be, I have to retire.

And was this your first time sleeping

with this gigantic of a dick?

No, I've done, he was, I fucked dread

and he was not as big as dread.

I used to be able to take it a lot better.

I don't know.

Really?

I just, I can't do giant.

Maybe you just had a bad day.

Maybe you just needed to stretch.

I don't know.

I'm afraid now.

Well, maybe, yeah.

Maybe it's cause I just wasn't being enough of a hoe.

So my pussy got like out of shape.

I can imagine that, yeah.

Or people might argue in shape.

Wow.

Okay.

But so no more giant dicks.

What does you going crazy this year look like?

Are you trying to push yourself to the limit

or are you just trying to shoot some more cute stuff?

Why can't it be cute and to the limit?

Well, I feel like the limit is like gang bangs and stuff.

Yeah, I've never done anything.

I did one blow bang.

You don't think that's cute?

It can't be cute.

It's definitely not cute.

It's aggressive.

Okay.

So maybe that's what I'll try.

Has anyone ever done a cute blow bang?

I think mine was cute.

I had a cute blow bang.

Pink background.

You have an expansive definition of cute.

What?

But, okay.

So are you getting more stuff like that or no?

Maybe.

Maybe I will.

I haven't thought about it that far,

but you might be onto something.

Maybe I'll like purposefully shoot a cute gang bang

just to show you that it can be done.

Maybe you're going to have to tell the agent

it can only be a moderately sized gang bang,

which might make it a little bit hard, yeah.

Boyfriend dick only.

And we're going to shoot it.

I want to be wearing cute little jammy shorts

or something at home.

Make it look really candid and natural

because that happens in real life, right?

Right.

Is that your fantasy, another blow bang?

Probably more so a gang bang than a blow bang.

Blow bang was so much work.

Why?

Your mouth must have hurt.

Yeah, and my knees were so bruised the next day.

It was like, it's fun.

I love sucking dick and it was fun having that many,

but I wasn't getting a lot back.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

You need a break.

You're doing the whole time, right?

You're just on the floor.

I know.

Have you seen my blow bang?

No.

I was upside down in a handstand sucking all the dicks.

Yeah, it was crazy.

Oh, that sounds like a lot of work.

Whose idea was that?

Mine, because my knees needed a break

and I had one of the guys hold me upside down

with my legs open so my pussy was out for everyone to see.

And then he was just, this guy was holding me

under my legs with my legs open

with my face away from him, does that make sense?

And he was just basically rotating me in a circle

and all the guys were putting their dicks in my mouth.

It's always weird for me when I go to watch a blow bang

on the hub and the vagina's just getting ignored.

And I'm just kind of looking at it, just thinking like,

this is so strange.

But actually, I think that's what made mine good

because we were taking a break for a second

and I was just masturbating, trying to stay in the mood.

And while I was doing that,

one of the guys started coming and eating me out.

And then another guy started sticking his dick in my mouth

and then he made me squirt.

So we still had some irritation.

This guy comes over and starts eating you out.

How does he like preface that?

Does he say like, ma'am, may I?

I think I told him to.

Really? Yeah.

So you'd be having a lot of fun on set, huh?

Yeah, you have to.

Right, was this like while you had a boyfriend?

Like you would be doing whatever in terms of fluffing

the guys while you're shooting, even if you have a boyfriend?

I don't know, I don't remember.

I never have like given a fuck about that.

Like I said, I've never let relationships interfere

with my career whatsoever.

Is it like expected though, if you're the talent

that you have to fluff the guy off camera?

It's not, but I always do because I like it.

And it makes the scene so much better.

Like when you meet the, like, when you see the scenes

that aren't as good, like you'll hear the guy talking

about how like, yeah, the girl wouldn't even talk to me

if the camera wasn't rolling.

And she was like, don't touch me, don't.

Yeah, because then you have to have chemistry.

I will like definitely, yeah, I will like go sneak

in the bathroom while the guy's getting ready for the scene

and go suck his dick just to like make him,

like you have to let him know, like you want it.

And that's not like frowned upon by like any of the directors

or anything, right?

If it was, I wouldn't care because I'm going to do,

as long as it's all consensual.

I just remember that you're the girl

who ate a guy's asshole out for what?

Like a half hour trying to get him hard

while you were texting your boyfriend.

Remember that story?

Yes, yeah, I forgot about that.

I don't know if we talked about that on the last episode.

I feel like we did because you love this story.

I love that story because that to me just shows

how fucking weird the porn world is.

And how committed you are.

That story and me asking you to pee in my mouth in Hawaii

are the ones that you always liked it.

Yeah.

And I'm like, yes, I forgot about that as well.

You didn't want me to waste my pee by peeing in the ocean.

You were like, oh, you should have saved that

and peed in my mouth for my OnlyFans.

And I was like, whoa.

And my aunt and my boyfriend was there too

when I said that to you.

And do you think that he felt any sort of way

when you said that?

I don't give a fuck if he did.

He didn't mention it?

No, he wouldn't dare.

It takes a thug to date you.

It takes a what?

A thug.

Maybe that's why I'm single,

because you're all a bunch of pussies.

Well, definitely, it's a big workload

to date someone like you, I would say.

If you were in a relationship with a guy,

would he have to be open to doing threesomes

or other things?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I've never been monogamous ever in my life.

Even when I was in high school,

the only time I dated guys, we were still open.

But okay, you've been saying that you've been

pretty boring for the last year or so.

Are you still doing freaky shit in your private life

or do you do most of your freaky stuff on camera?

I did most of my freaky shit in my private life, actually,

more so, which I feel bad about.

Like I said, this year, I was more so focusing on myself.

I had sex with my married friends a couple times.

They're like my fuck buddies,

because they know that I'm not really

fucking with a lot of people right now,

so it's nice because I can just go fuck them

when I want to.

Really?

When they want me to.

Are you best friends with the girl or the guy

or how does this work?

Definitely more the wife, but both of them.

I'm friends with both of them.

And she's like, can you come over tonight?

We want to hang out with you?

Yeah.

That's not weird.

No.

Is it like a wining and dining type thing?

Sometimes.

We'll all go hang out and then she'll be like, just stay.

I can imagine me and her doing that,

but it's like always, why wouldn't we just shoot content?

You know?

I could imagine us hanging out with a girl,

going get some drinks, hooking up with her after.

But if we went to dinner and we all went back

to our place to watch something.

We already hooked up with her.

That's old school.

That's like, we're comfortable with you.

That's different.

So you wouldn't just want to hook up with me for fun?

No, I would.

I'm just saying that the thing I'm talking about

is like you meet a new girl

and you're going to hook up with her.

Why would we not do it on camera?

We always end up doing it on camera

because why wouldn't we?

Yeah, but it is fun when we don't.

Turn off the cameras.

Yeah.

Super fun.

We're going to put it in the corner.

We're just going to put it in the corner.

No, just don't.

It's nice when you don't pay attention to it.

The angles don't come out good,

but like you're like, I'm just having fun.

Fuck it.

Have we ever fucked off camera?

I don't think so.

I don't think so.

Only fans and then this once.

Did we, we didn't hook up at all at Riley's Bachelor.

I was fucking all the girls there,

but I don't think I fucked you.

I drank your breast milk.

I was pumping.

I took that picture of you pumping.

I remember you on the boat.

I was on the boat pumping.

Did you bang anyone that night at Riley's wedding?

I didn't bang any of the guys,

but I fucked every girl there except Lena apparently.

That night?

Not that, just like throughout the whole trip.

She's not the bachelorette that I went on.

Not on the wedding.

Yeah, because the bachelorette yacht got freaky.

Yeah.

I was watching.

If I were dating you,

what could I expect in terms of treatment, service?

Like, are you just going to bring girls home

once in a blue moon, surprise me?

Like, how does that work if you have a boyfriend?

I have like this best friend and we have this rule

where like we're not allowed to date anyone

without the other one of us fucking them

to like make sure they're like worthy of us.

A girl.

A girl, yeah.

So every guy that I've like dated or wanted to date

like has to fuck her and vice versa.

How early into your talking to this guy

does that usually get initiated?

Immediately, immediately, immediately.

Because like, I'm not going to waste my time

getting to know you if you're just going to be trash in bed.

So I'm definitely a firm believer

in like fucking on the first date.

Wow.

You're calling it, hey, I'm going on a date tonight.

I might need you.

Well, no, no, I'll fucking first.

I'll fucking first.

And then if it's like good enough for a round two,

in that case, she has to come to like approve.

I approve, now she has to approve.

If I went on a date with you and I'm a single guy

and you told me, yeah, I have this friend

and any guy that I date,

like you're going to have to fuck her too.

In my mind, it's immediately like,

okay, I am sticking around until I fuck the friend

at the very least.

So you're definitely going to be keeping me around

for a little while.

Because it didn't take long for me knowing her,

for her to be like, yeah, like, you know,

maybe me and you could hook up with my friend Emily,

my roommate.

You were asking about threesome on the first date.

It was not my idea.

But I'm saying like, you've guaranteed

that I was going to kick it with you

a few more times right there, you know?

Because guys like me, we're just pigs, you know?

You're just pigs.

Pigs.

No, I definitely let them know.

Scared away any guys who like fucked you on the first date

and then you're like, all right, round two,

my friend's coming and they're like, no, no, no, no.

No, because I wouldn't even give someone like that a chance.

Okay.

I can pretty much feel them out,

like chatting with them before a date

to see how like open and fun they are.

Because who, I would not date someone like that.

That's boring.

Yeah.

Are you trying to stay single now or are you like?

Hell yeah.

Yeah.

Hell yeah.

So you're only going to get in a relationship

if you can't avoid it.

I'm, what was that?

You're only going to get into a relationship

if you can't avoid it.

Like if you're so in love.

No, that's not going to happen.

There's no chance.

I mean, it's happened to you a bunch of other times.

No, I wasn't even so in love with any of them.

It's like just kind of the past time.

Really?

I like companionship.

That sounds really cold.

I like companionship.

I like partnership.

I like romance.

I like friendship.

But I definitely, like everyone that I've dated

have like firmly known like that's not like my soulmate

and not like, I don't want to get married.

Really?

So what's different this time?

How are you going to be able to actually turn down guys

that you see as potential soulmates?

It won't be hard because I've never felt that way.

The only time I've like dated is basically

when I'm like bored or lonely.

Really?

Yeah.

So.

That's pretty much the only reason to date somebody

is because you're bored or lonely, right?

Yeah, but I'm like next year, like I said,

I really am going to focus on like, like working more

and trying to make more investments

outside of the adult industry.

So I'm dating is like at the back of my mind.

I hope fucking and being a whore is at the front.

I hope none of your exes see this.

I feel like they'll be sad.

But the dynamics got to be kind of different too

because you live somewhere where on the bright side,

you don't, you know, in LA it's just burnt out.

Like every guy you meet, you're going to,

he's probably fucked a bunch of your friends and shit.

Well, you live somewhere where it's like.

But that's a good thing in my eyes.

A much small, oh it is, okay.

You don't have to reference this to text about.

But where you live, it's like a much smaller pool of guys,

but realistically, you know, they're kind of like fresh meat

in comparison to all the dudes out here.

No, I've lived in like the city that I live in in Utah.

I've lived there for over a decade

and everyone there that I want to fuck, I have fucked.

So I haven't really like, yeah, but that's, that's okay.

Because it's like, I know everyone who's good.

And if I want them, I can like call or text them.

I feel like if you're in a remote area like that,

when you're on Tinder, you're turning the radius

up to like a two hour drive because even a two hour drive

for me, a two hour drive, if I was dating,

if a girl lived in San Diego,

that's like impossible, like never.

It's like they might as well live in New York.

Yes, they might as well live in France.

But where you live, two hour drive is kind of like,

whatever, like it's not that bad, right?

But there's nothing, like that's Vegas at that point.

And that's too many people to sort through with Vegas.

Because outside of St. George,

it's just the middle of the desert.

There's nothing, there's nothing around it.

So I'm just stuck with like the 22 people

that we have there.

And I probably have fucked all of them.

When I used to go back to my hometown in New Hampshire,

I would always have that feeling.

You go into the bar and you're just looking around,

and you're just like, this is the dating pool?

I'm glad I escaped.

I don't understand how the fuck anybody

is sticking this out, you know?

Damn.

Okay, what else is going on in your life?

I know you got all kinds of projects.

I don't, like I told you, I've been taking it easy.

Just like I built my house,

and I finished building it like a year ago,

but I'm still like, it's so hard to pick art and decor.

And I hit you up before for your interior designer.

Yeah, I hate that shit.

Yeah, it's so stressful.

But I painted my whole closet pink, so that's about it.

That's nice.

What happened to your braces?

I got them off finally, so I can give you a blowjob

without having my mouth bleed again.

It bled?

Do you remember we talked about this at the last one?

I was talking about suction,

and the back brackets would dig into my cheeks.

Yeah, so after a while I would spit blood out afterwards.

But yeah, so now I can suck dick with that.

Your dome giving is a lot better now?

Well, you have to let me know.

I will let you know.

But I've never understood that

because it's like the braces are on the front of the teeth.

So why would it really impact the back too?

No, it's because the teeth in the back,

the brackets, when I like suction my mouth,

it's like cutting into my cheeks,

and it's painful, so it makes me like do it less.

So I can't suction as good.

There is stuff back here too.

So it's not like you're feeling the braces.

It's not like you're feeling the braces on your dick,

but I'm feeling it on my cheeks.

Oh, that totally makes sense, yeah.

There's a lot of gear in there.

Yeah.

For me, it was just on the outside

of all my teeth the whole way.

But when you make a suction with that,

like it will cut into your cheek.

The back wires, yeah.

Those are my least favorite memories of having braces

is when I used to, because I was like 13, 14,

and I would get in fights,

and you just get punched in the face,

and your braces just enter into your mouth.

You were getting punched in the face when you were 13?

I was fighting all the time, yeah.

I was punching other people too,

but I mean, you know, I had braces.

He's been like this for a long time.

I mean, I was fighting with my sister at that age,

but not like other people.

I was fighting, I fought this kid in the woods

because he stole my Jinko jeans.

And I had a, it was Halloween,

so I had Insane Clown Posse face paint on,

and my mom just so happened to drive by

and see that we were fighting on the side of the road

after school, and she pulled in.

Were you raised in LA?

No.

New Hampshire.

That story would have been totally different

if it took place in LA.

I know.

Your mom would not, really unlikely

that your mom would just drive by on a random street.

It was unlikely where I grew up too.

I don't know how the fuck she ended up there.

I had a crazy fight with my sister once,

and we were fighting in the house,

and we fought all the way down the stairs

into the living room, and my mom's like,

I had my little sister there,

and she starts crying, and my mom's like,

stop, you're scaring your sister.

Like, not stop, because you guys are gonna hurt each other,

but stop, because you're scaring her.

So we took it outside, and we ended up

with like a police helicopter spotlight on us.

So she played favorites?

You were the black sheep, or what?

There were seven of us.

Oh.

I think that she like,

There's just too many. Where do you fall

in the line of your sisters?

I'm the fifth, I'm sorry. How favored?

Oh, wow.

I think I was the favorite for a while,

but probably not anymore.

With the whole porn thing?

No, actually surprisingly not porn.

They don't care about that?

Oh, my mom was so proud of me.

Like, when I told her, when I first told her

that I was doing porn, she was like a little like,

I waited like a year to like tell anyone,

and by then I had like a bunch of accomplishments,

so I'm like, hey, you can't like talk shit

if I show you like all the things that I've done.

So I told her, and she was like a little like,

in distress, I could see,

but before she could even say anything,

I brought out like my penthouse cover,

and my Hustler cover, and like a bunch of the like,

my box cover, like DVDs, and I had nominations

for AVN already at that point.

So, and then she was like, I show her my like penthouse,

and she's like, can I keep this?

Like, she was so proud of me.

She brought her mom to AVN, I met her mom.

She made my dress, that blue dress that lit up.

So cool.

See, that's funny because like the penthouse cover,

I could totally understand your parents

thinking that that was dope, but like saying,

mom, I'm 0.01% on OnlyFans,

it's just not gonna hit the same, you know?

No, she would be proud of that too.

Well, if you just sold her the dollar amount.

She just like always said, like anything that we,

that any of us do, she just wants us

to like be the best at it.

So she's definitely, I think, proud that I've like,

at least had some accomplishments.

What if you were like the best fentanyl user?

Oh, then I'd be fucking dead.

Yeah, you wouldn't be here.

I'm just saying, there's certain things

you don't wanna be the best at, right?

Well, yeah, maybe that's one, yeah.

Right, okay.

All right, anything that I should know

about where you're at sexually, what should we do today?

Well, I haven't had sex in like three weeks.

Really?

Just because of the giant dick, or is this just because?

No, just because I've been like not hoeing very much

this year, so I'm just like ready to go.

We're about to take you to the hoeing region.

Yeah.

Let's go.

Let's go to the hoeing region.

Why am I just staring at me, like what?

Missed you.

It's not weird to kiss you without braces.

I know.

Is it better?

I think it's a little softer.

A little softer?

Just stop it, the braces are fun.

These are fun.

I know, right?

Good.

Look, I needed this.

Needs to get you laid more.

Yes.

You're such a good friend to me, sharing your husband.

You have a big job here, babe.

Your pussy needs it.

No panties?

No panties, oops.

I'm not wearing panties either.

Hell yeah.

Should we be able to see this new and improved top?

Oh yeah, without braces?

Yeah.

Remind me how he likes it.

He just wants you to put it in his mouth.

Let me just have you like go nice and deep like that.

Grr, grr.

Oh, oh fuck, my mouth is watery, I fucking want it.

Wow.

Is that like a boyfriend cock?

It's a good husband cock now.

Oh, upgrade.

Oh my god, I'm literally drooling from crying.

That is a wet couch when you slip inside it on it.

Fuck, I can't wait to feel that inside of me.

I think she needs a bib.

Please, please.

Oh, yes.

Oh, fuck, I need it so bad.

Right there, right there.

Oh, I missed you guys.

How's that cock feel?

Oh, it's so fucking good, it's just what I needed.

I love putting my balls on that cock.

I want more.

I'll fuck you guys.

You made me cum so good I couldn't even say it out loud.

I felt it.

Yeah?

You can feel my pussy pulsating against your cock?

Yeah.

As I'm cumming all over it?

Watching my wife slick it off.

Yeah.

I'm gonna get off.

I want to watch you make her cum, too.

Great idea.

Can I stick it in?

Can I stick it in?

Nice and wide.

Watch it slide in and out.

All right, I've seen your pretty face.

This is a great combo.

Oh, fuck, baby.

Oh, yes.

Yes.

Oh my god.

This is fucking good.

Yes, yes, right there.

Stick it back in.

Oh, yeah.

Oh my god.

Like your little butthole while you fuck.

Oh, it's so fucking wet.

Yeah?

Oh, you like the way that pussy feels?

Yeah.

It's having a really fun time.

Oh, yeah.

Take it.

Oh, yeah.

Deep.

Does it feel good?

Amazing.

Come down on her.

Hold that ass.

Oh, it's so fucking pretty doing that.

I don't know how fun she was.

Are you going to bounce on that fucking car right now, too?

I want to see the ass bouncing up and down on it.

Oh my god.

And those pretty feet, too.

Hey, guys.

We need to see your little hands on our big ass.

Oh my god.

Look at it bounce.

That's so fucking hot.

Yeah, ride that fucking car.

Oh, yes.

Yes.

Oh my god.

I can see how wet it is.

That pussy's so fucking wet.

Oh, shit.

I want to lick that pussy, too.

Slide down onto it.

Oh, look at the way it fucking grips.

Tight fucking pussy.

Bouncing up and down on your cock.

Oh, yeah.

Ride that fucking cock.

Oh my god.

Oh, I love watching it grip.

You guys both bend over?

Yes.

More doggy.

I love doggies.

Yeah.

She needs more, baby.

I need it.

I need it.

She's been dick deprived, so I'm going to let you.

You can just give it all to her.

Oh, fuck.

You sure?

She needs it.

She needs it bad.

Yeah.

We had a little chat before we started.

Yeah?

Like, I'll let you get more of the dick.

Oh, she's the best friend ever.

Did you see her from Eat My Load?

I did.

Oh, feed it to me.

Yeah, you can just feed me that fucking cum.

Yeah.

Oh, feed me.

Ready and eating.

That was a good one.

That was a huge load.

Want to try a little bit?

Pretty yummy.

It's really yummy.

Oh my god.