Penelope Kay - xxxCinema

Penelope Kay - xxxCinema

0:00 / 55:14

Transcript

1,547 words • 161 segments

Mama always said most people don't know what an apology is, that for most people

I'm sorry it's just another substitute for saying shut up. Another way of saying

can we please just move on and forget about the shitty thing I did. But a real

apology is a contract, a promise you'll do better, that you won't make the same

mistake again. Mama was Catholic, born and raised like her mama and her mama before

her. Everyone messes up, she always said. Everyone sins and that's okay. So long as

you own up and apologize, so long as you make a contract with God through

confession and you mean it, really mean it. We live in an age of unprecedented

temptation. Everywhere you turn, everywhere you look, it's inescapable.

Thanks to this, the devil's mirror. Digital adultery, grotesque fornication

are only just a swipe away and you're always alone with it. There's no

accountability. The moment of weakness and we are a servant to the digital pin

who doesn't even charge you to watch the horrors it inflicts on its victims.

Teaching the young and the impressionable that virginity is a joke,

it's not. It's a treasure and it's not just pornography. Social media has

replaced our human connection, our sense of community. Instead of talking to your

neighbors, instead of striking up a conversation with a stranger on the

street, we endlessly like and swipe, like and swipe and like and swipe. There's a

beauty to confession. It's the chance to own up, to apologize, really apologize and

make a contract with God that you'll do better. But some people never change. For

some people, confession is a way to shut up their own guilt so they can carry on

with their life, confident that their sins have been forgiven.

Mama's dead now. I know she's washing and I hope she forgives me for what I'm

about to do, even though I'm not sorry. But he, he will be. Just a moment, just

finishing my prayer, have patience. Come in. Father Rob, sorry to bother you. Yes,

Phil, isn't it? Yes. I wanted to talk to you about something important. Okay. I know

I'm new to your church, but I just, I need to know that I can trust you. Of course. Whatever is

said within these walls is between you, me, and God. I've been having a lot of

feelings about the temptations, you may say. Okay. How old are you? I'm 20. I'm just a junior in college. Ah, a challenging time for

temptations, indeed. Look, there's a lot of peer pressure you're going to be

pulled into a number of vices, but look, temptation is a part of life. It's what

we do with those feelings that define our path. You know, I don't drink. I don't do drugs. I don't have sex. Church teaches us to

seek strength through prayer and penance. We direct our energies into faith and

service. It's not easy, Belle, but it's a path towards grace. But what if that's not enough?

Let me try again, Belle. We all struggle, but we don't let struggle defy our purpose.

Your virginity is a precious treasure. Virginity is a reflection of the biblical Mary,

her purity, her divine role. But wasn't Mary married to Joseph? They didn't, you know.

Her situation was unique, meant to support her divine mission, not a standard for all. I just

think it's a little confusing, you know. Jesus, he hung out with thieves and prostitutes.

Him and Mary were pretty tight. You don't think they ever, you know, had sex? He showed them a path

to grace, not a path through his bedchamber. It was about redemption, even for those most

shunned by society. But insisting on virginity, don't you think it's just an old relic from

Pax? Back then it made sense. A woman didn't have any rights, birth control. She needed it,

because otherwise she'd be screwed, right? It's more than just old rule, the reality of women's

circumstances and how they were treated in most of history. It's about seeing sex as

sacred, not just safe. But if it's with someone you love, shouldn't you test the waters?

Shouldn't a woman know her man can meet all of her needs and vice versa? True love waits, Bell.

There's no need. It doesn't need to be rushed into physical or trials. Were you always so patient,

even before you became a priest? Wasn't obvious. Perfect. But I chose a new path. You know,

all the other girls in college talk about doing it in, you know, the other place.

The other place? The bottom. Oh, I see. Yes, I heard of the other place.

Is it that much worse of a sin? Is it still keeping my true virginity?

Well, I mean, um, God forgives if you seek it. What's a sin? Well, what's worse of a sin?

Smoking a cigarette or smoking other things? The cigarette, of course. Men isn't the same as sex.

I let a stranger, a man who sees me and only loves me for my body, or a good,

godly man, who sees beauty beyond my physical appearance, my soul, my heart. Yes, but not by

much. The other day when you gave me communion, I felt your desire. I felt your finger lingering

on my tongue. I tasted the smoke. But it's okay. We strayed just this once. God will forgive us

for it. Please forgive us in my ass. You do, Father. I trust you. Yes, Father. So only in my ass.

Please, just in my ass. Are you 100% sure? Yes, Father. Father's name and name. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Oh, you should take your dress off. In my ass, Father. Just in my ass. Watch your man, Father.

Smug, I want you to smug me. Is that what you want? Yes, Father. Is that what you want? Yes.

God will forgive us and save us from these walls. As long as we seek it, he will forgive us.

Yeah, it does.

Thank you, Father. Thank you for fucking my ass and helping me keep my truth.

Of course. Of course I want to do that for you. I just want you to be happy and know that you're safe here.

To save us from these walls is just you, me, and the fucking God.

Nasty, nasty godly man.

Father would like feet. Nasty.

Oh, yes. Yes, Father. Fuck. Yes, yes, just like that, Mother, just like that.

Oh, my God. You like the attention, Father? Yeah. Fuck, yes. Yes, yes. I love it though.

Come closer to hell. You do. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Fuck, yes. Oh, my God.

Fuck. Do it again. Fuck. Yes, yes, yes.

I wouldn't have gone himself to do this. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Fuck, fuck. Loss your chance.

Don't get Father by my ass. Don't get Father fucking ruined my house. No, he is Father, he is Father, he is Father.

Oh yes, Father, yes

I spit in your face, Father

The taste of you fucked up

Yes, yes, yes, yes

Yes, yes

Is that Father? Yes, it is Father

Yes, it is Father

Yes, it is

Yes, yes, yes, yes

Yes, yes, yes, yes

And my mouth feels like you cut

Is that Father?

Is that God?

Oh, fuck

Yes, yes, yes

Oh my God

Fuck yeah

Yes, yes, yes

Please sit in this room then, Father

But you said God will

always forgive

So don't call me a sinner

then, Father

My mom is right, Father

Oh my God

Give me your spit, Father

You're not good at spitting, Father

Pack my ass, Father

Yes, yes, yes

You're so fucking good

I want your full blessing

Right in my mouth, Father

Right in my mouth

I want your full blessing

Right in my fucking mouth, Father

Yes, Father

Give it to me

Give me your blessing

Right in my mouth, Father

Right in my fucking mouth

Give it to me, Father

Give it to me, Father

Give me that blessing

Thank you for your blessing

We should get your office cleaned up

So it actually stays

between her, me, and God

Here's your underwear, child

Thank you

What have I done?

You should go

and pray

And I need to do some

praying myself

You don't remember me, do you?

Mama was a good woman

She worked a double shift at the hospital

She helps people

She really helps people

Only a piece of shit

hypocrite like you

Your driving killed her

She was a good woman

She was

Here you are, a priest abusing

his powers, his connections

Fucking a 21-year-old

Didn't even get a fucking slap on the wrist for it

You should leave

You should go

God help you

God help me?

I don't think you're in any position

speaking on behalf of God

What's worse?

A hypocrite piece of shit like you?

Or a 20-year-old whore?

No one's gonna believe

Some will

And there he fucking is

The mask finally comes off

I think God's gonna have a really hard time

minding this one

That even fucking matters to you

Auto-generated transcript

Mama always said most people don't know what an apology is, that for most people I'm sorry it's just another substitute for saying shut up. Another way of saying can we please just move on and forget about the shitty thing I did. But a real apology is a contract, a promise you'll do better, that you won't make the same mistake again. Mama was Catholic, born and raised like her mama and her mama before...